I am the only girl in the family. Before I knew it, 18 years had passed.
I am the reason why my mother stayed with someone very late and had an only child. From the time we started our life together, my parents were very concerned about me. After drinking, it disappears after a few days.
My mother taught me patience and gave birth to Nemai. There were times when I thought about divorcing my father, but I did not divorce my father because my only child would become a widower. I think that if my parents had divorced at that time, I would not be hugging my pillow and crying on my bed today.
My mother’s wish for my child to be healthy has gone wrong everywhere and I will never forget it. But I can never blame my mother.
How can I blame my mother who dedicated her whole life to me since my birth. When I was young, I used to think that when my father was a child, when his father was always arguing with his mother.
When he grew up and became a child, he realized that his father was not like that, and he went dark inside. I was not destined to sit on my father’s shoulder, take care of him, hold on to his sleeve and teach him whatever I wanted.
How long have I been begging my birth father to love me from a man with a heart like a foreigner, and how long it has been tickling at the corners of his eyes and cutting into his bones like fur. There was a time when I was lying sick with a temperature of 39 degrees, and I left my backpack because I was going on vacation.
There was a time when I was yelled at as a helpless animal who could not even be a kindergarten teacher. When the tears run out, my tears are about to run out. I didn’t get a chance to feel what kind of person Dad is. The place where Dad should be is filled with tears.
I used to think that I had a lot to lose because I was trying to be a father for the first time, but other fathers were also trying to be fathers for the first time. I wanted nothing more than to have a father like my father.
But this wish will never come true. Whenever girls talk about dating a man like their father, I secretly envy them because their fathers are very handsome people. Finally, being healthy is sometimes not a guarantee of happiness and peace of mind.
